She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
he just spelled fiance, "pheancie". I dont think he's ready to get married.
She was so loose she sounded like a jar of salsa. I didn't know that was even possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
I'm telling you the guy came in bought a box of condoms and all three of the chicks that came in behind him followed him to his car. I want his life
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
Question: have you ever spent your Tuesday evening helping your one-night-stand create a resume? Because I have...
His mom let me come to his house for a Booty call at 4am. She even cooked us breakfast in the morning and told me im a better moaner than his girlfriend of 4yrs.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize