dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
im about as happy as oj after his trial
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
if tampons were more like dildos the world would be a better place
i just rememebered i spent like 5 minutes on the ground warming some chicks toes.
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Let's get the cat blown out
I'm gonna try and get through this weekend sober, which is gonna be tough especially since I've already started drinking.
Randomize
