Midget Michael Jackson impersonator dancing to Beat it in Penn Station almost caused me to miss my train. God, I
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
Thanks for the ave Maria song you left on my phone that lasted for TEN minutes.
you grabbed his arm with one hand and the bottle of smirnoff with the other and headed off to your room you were on a mission
We are not turning the camelbak into a beer bong
Well I found you sipping ron diaz out of a child's dinosaur cup while sticking your fingers in the guy's fish tank and watching the "pirahnas" snap at your finger and laughing
She called all of my friends to find out where I was last night. 7 out of ten said their place.
Woke up next to a tiki torch spooning a plastic flamingo on a welcome mat i've never seen before with a "happy valentines day" balloon tied to my wrist, oh yeah and "i am a cougar" is written on my chest in sharpee and all the kitchen furniture is upside down...
At least your night didn't end with three cops seeing your ass and you sitting on the ground in a wig throwing your shoes at people
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
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