I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Just found out I have to work new year's eve. It's like one final 'fuck you' from 2009.
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
Sudden realization: I dumped him because he was too immature, yet I am the one who moved back into my parent's basement post-breakup.
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
