There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
I love you. Thanks for all the blowjobs.
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
I still have the video of you three making soup in my kitchen and asking random people for permission DURING the party, not after like usually
Don't remember, didn't happen
I HAVE THE VIDEO YOU DICK IT HAPPENED
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
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