Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
Whenever I miss you I just turn on Tool Academy
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
also I saw his dick in the morning light and it was glorious. Like staring upon your birthday cake you ordered from heaven and going " can't wait to eat that later"
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
