with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Sorry I never got back to you, I ended up at a party with pot ice cream, pot apple cider, and hash vegetable oil.
THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
Woke up behind one of the fraternity brothers houses in the grass wearing a guinness hat and aviators hugging a 30 rack box with a zonie on my chest next to a campfire.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
