i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
A part of me realizes this is a bad time to text. But I override it with my awesomeness
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I swear to god if I have to repeat this to you one more mother fucking time I will flip fucking shit and acidic rain will pour down upon your mother fucking soul
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
He actually said the words 'I miss you' followed by 'I wanna have sex with your face'. I'd say that's a win.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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