You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
i puked out the bus window last night on the way home. i remember it, but i don't remember everyone else screaming to put their windows up.
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
Let me just say....i'm sorry about setting your carpet on fire. I had no idea that the paper towel would burn that quickly.
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
I was giving this guy head and he stopped me to look me in the eyes and say "you have a gift"
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
I'm drunk and kinda wanna go home but now I have to go have more sex, my boxers are in the dryer
Randomize
