Rock
Scissors
Fuck
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Dude, this chick, who is smokin by the way, has 4 false teeth on top from a softball accident that she can take out if she wants... Who's getting amazing head tonight? This guy!
I don't know whether to be creeped out by the fact this chick can do that, or jealous because you're getting toothless head.
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Dude, she introduced me to her best friend form Russia and she was a 10. Her other Russian friend was even hotter. How did communism fail?
There are now half chewed girl scout cookies plastered to my windshield. Do you know anything about this?
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
Just had someone from Hells Angels snort coke off my tits...so I'm pretty much done with life now. 💀
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
I just want this to serve as a reminder in the morning that the topic of conversation at last call was the penis size of jesus.
Randomize
