i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Are you being sarcastic? I can't tell this time because you're in the hospital.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Is it rude if I don't go?
No. It is not rude if you don't go to her cat's Star Wars themed birthday party.
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
I woke up at 3:30 this morning to pee. Luckily, I didn't have to travel far as I was asleep in my CLOSET on my yoga mat. Good news is I had a pillow...
She's the queen of dating. She managed to get a date with a guy who saw her puke five times in two hours.
then a garbage truck rolls up to the club, they hop out, and walk right in like they own the place
he's the only real guy friend I've had who I've never made out with
Randomize
