I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
Everyone is sleeping and i'm sittin here in my iron man mask, watchin chelsea lately and tryin to figure out how to smoke through it.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I had to assert my dominance as Alpha Drunk.
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
We are balling out on levels, I think mikes about to go to jail. something to do with a unicorn and rainbows, the cops are not being reasonable.
Randomize
