Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
so i just drove past a racoon and a kid on a long board... god i love 4am white castle runs
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
Everything smells like vodka and bologna. WHAT DID YOU DO?
Also, I've found a new way to get drunk at work for free. Everytime I make a bushwhacker and there's extra... I put it in a cup. Its the Never ending drink.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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