New low: just hacked my moms facebook
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
His foreplay reminded me too much of breastfeeding.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Nothing says summer like lemonaid, but nothing says fuck yeah summer like lemonaid and vodkavodka
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
I'm honestly just now recovering from saint Patrick's day.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
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