I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
Im starting to think including a smiley face in texts may or may not be a code for 'lets have sex'
Im going to research this theory. . .
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
There r osticjed everywhere
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
The air taste purple.
He wouldn’t know a good thing if it bit him on the ass. Which, btw, I did.
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