Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
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I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
it was good sex until i became a rubber doll and he became a jack hammer, so i guess overall it was good
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
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I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
I know what you meant. If you want babies in time for your birthday, we gonna need either a time machine or a ski mask.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
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