just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
And I think short bridesmaids dresses are the best idea especially for bathroom sex
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
do you ever look at a card in your wallet and reminisce about all of the drugs youve done with it?
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Sorry you ended up in detox. It's not my fault you decided to walk downtown in only your underwater at 3am. I think the tequila took over.
Randomize
