I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
party gras won. party gras always wins.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
I wish I could have seen the drive thru woman's face after " May I please have 20 Mcflurrys.....and a large diet coke, I'm trying to watch my weight for bikini season."
I think the exact words were 'I'd lett him to the weirdest shit to me'
blue gatorade loses no color upon regurgitation
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
i just hope we're both dead or in prison at the same time
My brother is chasing tequila with vodka. Not sure how it will turn out, but I like his style.
I need someone to sew my vagina shut until I'm responsible enough to use it
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