Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just tipped the cab driver with pistachio nuts. And he loved it.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I just had a fifteen minute conversation with a Raccoon by the garbage bin. I was feeding it chex mix.
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
I need to stop being so honest when I'm drunk. I got proposed to by a stranger again last night. It's not my fault that I would be perfectly ok making sandwiches and giving blow jobs for the rest of my life.
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