I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
And now his mom knows I was dipping my pen in company ink
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
