It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
he told me he had a dream that he laid his head in my lap and silently gazed up at me. WHY AM I ALWAYS THE DUDE IN RELATIONSHIPS
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
Idk if I should be worried or amused that my autocorrect changes the word STD to DTF.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
Randomize
