Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Don't worry. I told him just because you've gargled some balls in the past doesn't mean you'll be handling his.
I really wanted that to be shared. Thank you.
On a lighter note, my mom and I were playing scattergories, and for "things that you keep hidden" we both put dildo. Proof that we really are related.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
He kept walking up to every girl at the party saying "Hi, I'm George Clooney. No I won't marry you." He left with three girls.
its just been over 12 hours, and i`m dying, don`t know how i`m supposed to survive the holidays sexless
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
I don't mean to crush your hopes and dreams but having sex IN the Stanley Cup isn't possible
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
