Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I hate it when I can only see straight when I close one eye. I feel like that deserts the purpose of seeing with two eyes
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
at work, .. 47 yr old boss was in a fight. 2 BLACK EYES. I may get fired. I cant stop laughing
I told him i turn boys gay hoping that would scare him off. Finally i found a way to take advantage of my disability.
Just made a floating bacon boat for the hot tub. This is what America is all about.
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
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