Spraying perfume on pants makes them clean right?
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
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