I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Waitress cut us off at Chili's bar. New low
You drank almost the entire bottle of everclear and wanted to walk around. I guess your best friends sister is a cop and you wanted her to arrest you like the lil wayne song.... so sorry dude.
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Drunkasaurus has found a new cave to eat all the children she captured
I need to get you away from Bacardi 151 and out from under the bed
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
I have hit nutritional rock bottom I am spreading peanut butter on to lays potato chips
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Randomize
