You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
Just fell off a train. Bad.
the condom got lost in my hair
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
Two of us got arrested. Gonna be delayed a bit. Save me a burger.
Randomize
