i wanna make it FB official so he cant fuck anyone else. but that means i can't fuck anyone else either. CONUNDRUM
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
I just need like a magic vacuum to suck everything out of me and then an IV to put good stuff back in
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
don't worry, i'm not mad. i'm just angry. and furious. and about to set your ass on fire.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
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