How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I woke up this morning to a lot of blurry photos of a swan i must have chased down the riverbank and a handbag full of loose haribo.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I don't know where I'm at. But I'm pretty sure what I'm looking at is a small bear.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
He let me eat chexmix while we fucked... I think I love him.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
