If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
He made me this shot called the allergen. It was a shot of vodka with a Claritin dropped in it.
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Is there a single word to describe 'the last guy she slept with before meeting her husband'? Cause there should be.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
