I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
you sang the finger bang song from south park while fingering me. needless to say, kind of a turn off.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
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