I totally understand Scottish logic. No underwear+skirt=great
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
I just found three unopened cans of PBR behind our futon that I think I was saving for winter.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
After my date left I rallied and took the Asian girl home. Flexibility my friend.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize