dude, osama threatened the US again
dude. i slept with your sister last night
what?
I saw that as an opertune moment to drop some big news
I am spending my child support on dildos
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
Doing tuck and rolls down a stair case was not my brightest idea
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
We found Mulan.
I thought you were in bed what the hell
I'm just like... Utterly amazed that we're still alive at this point. Who'da thunk it....
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Randomize
