they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
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Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got sucker punched while I was making out with some girl...I think my molar might have flown into her mouth
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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