Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
What should i be more turned off about... his massive collection of condoms or that he asked me to sign my name by number 68 on the list posted on his wall?
I think the two go hand in hand.
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
She didn't even ask about the dinosaur pinata in my trunk. Like at this point I think these are the things she expects from me
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Someone spilled vodka all over the elevator floor. Bring straws.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
There two guys dressed as FEMA workers with jump-suits that say "Post-Disaster Breast Examination Division"
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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