Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
i think i would be more confident if i were chinese.
Busta Rhymes just yelled at me! He cut a song off and I was clapping and he looked right at me and said "don't fucking clap." I was that white guy.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
Some bum walked up and watched me getting head last night for like 5 mins before I noticed him
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
Did i actually sleep there? Or did i just get sand everywhere?
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
The hint wasn't even a hint. it said "stop talking to her" that's pretty straightforward
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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