I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
Why must everything this weekend have to do with something going into or coming out of my vagina?
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Today is my 3 year wedding anniversary...and I've seen three different dicks.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
