thats the last time I fuck a piece of fruit on camera for him.
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
she was so wasted that she tried to tuck me in and read the jokes on the taco bell sauce as a bed time story
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
She lost her glasses and we found them on the roof. Don't ask questions. Kings cup was intense last night.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
and eventually we just all took our pants off
Randomize
