The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
you know what would be great? if dirt tasted like steak and could get you drunk.
A squiggle pen was my first vibrator back when I was young. I would lock myself in my bedroom with that thing. Oh to be 8 again.
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
By the way, your roommate is right. His penis is much bigger than yours.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
I don't know how I got here... but I think I'm in a Christian Impact meeting... I'm trying to act as straight as possible. They can sense gay.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
I hopped in a random dudes car outside the strip club at 3pm on a Sunday and said "Follow that car!"
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
I'm not letting you use my bathroom unsupervised anymore. You peed in the sink thinking it was a urinal...
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
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