i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
you screamed 'he won't go on a date with me, but he gave me a free junior chicken'
well imagine, me dating the manager equals free junior chickens for everyone
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
Then you ran outside and said you were gonna give the snowman a blowjob
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Ugh why does it have to be margarita Monday. Why can't it be pants off dance off beer pong but with jager Monday.
It looks like I murdered a care bear and put its blood in my hair to warn the others off.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
The guy at the liqiour store just said "Wow haven't seen you in awhile, is everything okay?"
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