I have no idea who these bands are he's listening to. If his current playlist was a pandora station, however, it would be titled "music for closet cock gobblers"
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Dude I think I vomited on the wireless internet box too...it isnt working.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
he signed me a blank check so today i get to decide if i want to be a saint or a millionaire
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
And then she said "wanna make a vine of me twerking on the wall?"
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
