This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Randomize