he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
I wish you could order shots online.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
i wish semen tasted like chocolate
It makes me feel uncomfortable and unsafe when he licks my pants
I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I'm shaving my vagina to the lion king soundtrack. How's your 9am?
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
