yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
i really wish facebook had an app for when you are looking at a chick's photo album, you could just skip to the ones where she and/or her friends are dressed like skanks
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
We walked into the bar in The Flying V formation from The Mighty Ducks. We were ready.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
The worst part is there are all kinds of happy creatures out here like fucking snow white and i'm sitting in semi-dead grass, hungover with a burnt butt
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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