Had sex with him. My tampon is now in my brain. May need surgery.
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
We didn't talk. I watched you drop an egg on the floor. And watched you praise your haunted broom.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
Philosophical question for you: is it better to go into work slightly drunk or slightly coked out?
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
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