She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
drunk sex in a shower = bad idea broken arm
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Just dodged a state trooper, your weed will be there shortly. Fear the unbustable!
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
I FUCKED WHEELCHAIR DUDE
HE'S INTO WEIRD SHIT
GOOD KIND OF WEIRD SHIT
If i'm not ready, make sure i'm alive. Not passed out dead in the shower.
I'll still do breakfast to celebrate the life you've had.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
