You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Look I'm sorry I shaved your cat, but get over it.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
I started scrolling back in our texts looking for context and a picture of your dick rose like the Great Pumpkin in the middle of my screen.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
hey can you send me that pic of that dude?...if this isn't Rochelle's phone...can you please find and tell Rochelle to send me that picture of that dude?
Randomize
