I hope mine doesn't look like that
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
Yeah, sam & jessica were trying to have sex and you walked in & started coaching them through it with a fake hulk hogan mustache on.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
What the fuck was I thinking eating an entire tub of potato salad on acid. My stomach today bro
Randomize
