Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
want to meet me after class and possibly get arrested for indecent exposure?
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
michael burned off one of his eyebrows making a pizza so he had to shave off the other one to make it look even. it doesn't look right, but I'd still bang him.
Is valentines day the worst or best day to ask for a threesome? I'm weighing some options on this high-risk manoeuvre.
How the fuck am I supposed to enjoy a third ice day from school if I only bought enough alcohol for 2?
I don't know, maybe act like an adult who teaches children for a living
It's like we're not even friends
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
I swam, I rode a bicycle, I rode a horse, I danced. It was like a real life tampon advert.
I’m going to fail his daughter so she stays in my class and I can keep fucking him. BEST. ORGASMS. EVER.
Then you can teach the kid to be a home wrecker
Randomize
