no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
My cha cha got a haircut
thank god. going down on you was like chewing on astroturf
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
and I'm sitting five inches from the tv scrunched up in a ball watching doug. It's like I'm five again...except I'm more stoned than the dude who created this show
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
I was convinced to buy a man thong.
But it's Armani so it's okay.
God I just out gayed myself.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
