There's a "art of the blow job" class in the city. We should go
Baby, I'm all set with that. That would be like trying to teach bruce lee how to kick someone in the head
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
I have to have sex with him again. I feel like I need to train him so no other girl experiences that bad of sex.
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
Of course I'm not above using aladdin and pot to get laid, this is america
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
hope your day is as exciting as mine- one of our trauma patients just stole an ambulance out of our bay... WITH AN EMT STILL IN IT.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
You chugged Absolut from a beer bong. Why WOULDN'T you be a champion?
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
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