just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
Fact: The drinking you do in college doesn't affect your liver in real life.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey. Hey you. Just wanted to let you know that I'm adorable. FUCKING ADORABLE. That is all. This update brought to you by our proud sponsor bud light.
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
No...this little piggys going to the bar
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a low moment when you're looking at your girlfriends tits on your daughter's phone..
A few days ago I apparently came up, asked her to make me soup, and handed her a can of coconut milk.
Thank god he came over. I had to have some good sex to makeup for all the bad sex I've been having.
People who don't like drugs and guac are not people I chose to associate with
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Randomize