Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
Got kicked out of the baseball game with a 4 officer escort. Not bad for a monday night.
Also, we should really buy some bandaids. Right now I'm using toilet paper and scotch tape, but I don't really think that's sanitary.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
The best part of last night is not remembering half of it
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
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